Gross Grub Series 8: Eating Scorpion! (and overnight in hospital)

The last in the Gross Grub Series, is Scorpions!

This one I wanted to be special. I picked the largest scorpion I could find in the whole market. There were many to choose from but this one was the biggest.

I paid 5 baht (about 15 cents). I drove back to my room and got to filming.

The woman at the market told me – don’t eat the stinger. She didn’t have to tell me that, I’d have to be homer-dumb to eat that thing even if it was fried. I pulled off the stinger -and it didn’t come off easily. Which led me to believe – the scorpion wasn’t all that cooked. I should have stopped there, but, trusting the market lady that sells these things for a living – I thought – aaaaaaahhhh, why not?

I started with the claws.

The claws are inedible. BUT, the meat inside was just like crab meat. Basically I think a scorpion IS a crab that doesn’t like water.

I crunched the claws in my mouth and sucked out the meat. Good stuff! I thought, hey, this might be the best thing I’ve eaten all day!

I pulled off the legs – having learned something from eating the Giant Cockroach from day 6, that legs DO NOT belong in the mouth. They don’t even break down from the teeth in your mouth – how would they break down in your stomach? I’m about to see the answer to that question as I have my first #2 since eating the legs and all the bugs from this series.

So, I went for the head. I later learned that in the upper jaw is where the poison is manufactured that gets stored in the tail. I ate it with abandoned, thinking – the claws were great – what’s a little head?

I ate the entire thing. It was QUITE a bit more chewy (tough) than the giant cockroach, and not really that great of a taste. When I got to the azz- I stopped and removed it – it appeared there was something left there – don’t they clean the bowels on these things before people eat them??? JEEZ!

I ate the tail which was like eating twigs.

I finished filming another video and hurried off to run at a park since it was getting dark. I started to salivate wildly – like an animal.

I thought it was just the grease they used to fry the scorpion and other bugs I just ate so I thought nothing of it.

I ran about 30 minutes when I realized –

hey, dummy, you can hardly breathe. What’s up?

I ran a bit more and when it didn’t get better I walked. As I walked it got worse. Soon I was breathing about half my normal capacity.

I thought, this sucks.

By the time I got to my motorbike my legs were shaking – like tremors. I was dizzy and my heart felt weird like not beating correctly.

I went back to room and got stuff for hospital, money, etc.

At emergency room I told them – and they said – scorpion allergy.

That sucks.

I could hardly breathe at this point.

They IV’ed me up with some dextrose and fed some anti-allergy meds into the line. They watched me a bit and told me to overnight it as anything can happen in first 24 hours.

I stayed overnight -and took more anti-allergy pills all night. I got gradually better as the night went on.

Woke up in the morning ready to go – and left about 9:00 I think.

What I learned upon looking up allergic reactions to scorpions is that:

1. Excess salivation like a Marmaduke is a key symptom.
2. Thousands of people die from it each year as they go into shock during the reaction.

Oh well, I’m still here.

So – this has been your Gross Grub Series. Occasionally I’ll find more videos on the net with this subject but for now – COUNT ME OUT! I ate more bugs that most people will eat their whole lifetime – on purpose or accident.

Be careful with Scorpions, snakes and things with venom. Apparently the heat while frying it doesn’t render it completely harmless!

Video – Eating Scorpion!

Other Gross Grub Series Posts:

Gross Grub 1: Ant Larvae – the post that started the infatuation… the FIRE if you will
Gross Grub 2: Grasshoppers – just like potato chips, if you believe that! (don’t)
Gross Grub 3: Silkworm Larvae – not too bad. Like eating patches of silk – creamy gushy silk, that is.
Gross Grub 4: Black Beetles
Gross Grub 5: Hellgrammites!
Gross Grub 6: Giant Chinese Cockroach!
Gross Grub 7: A girl from Cambodia eats Baby Birds!
Gross Grub 8: Eating Scorpion! – you’re here!
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Day 7: Gross Grub… from Cambodia, sure to Induce Dry Heaves….

First it was Ant Larvae… today… oooh.

I am disgusted to present… a video of a girl eating something that I’d have to take “a pass” on.

Here, take a look… I posted the video at my server, though this is NOT my video. Her site is slow to load as she has MANY videos on the home page. You’ll appreciate getting it from my server as it was slow loading for me at hers. Her site is: http://villagegirl.typepad.com/ The movies I saw were from Cambodia, but currently she is in NYC for some reason. She VLOGs – video blogs, so if you’re into that – watch more at her vlog.

Fried Baby Birds on the menu…

There is no way in Jesus, Mary, and all the saints – and baby jesus I could do what she’s doing…

these are baby birds maybe a few days old – a week or so? They must burn the feathers off first – or maybe there aren’t any yet. They eat the bones and everything – after frying it all just crumbles in you mouth (I’m told).

NASTY STUFF, eh?

More in store… keep tuning in…

Other Gross Grub Series Posts:

Gross Grub 1: Ant Larvae – the post that started the infatuation… the FIRE if you will
Gross Grub 2: Grasshoppers – just like potato chips, if you believe that! (don’t)
Gross Grub 3: Silkworm Larvae – not too bad. Like eating patches of silk – creamy gushy silk, that is.
Gross Grub 4: Black Beetles
Gross Grub 5: Hellgrammites!
Gross Grub 6: Giant Chinese Cockroach!
Gross Grub 7: A girl from Cambodia eats Baby Birds! You’re here!
Gross Grub 8: After I ate this I almost died of an allergic reaction! Don’t miss this one… (Eating Scorpion!)
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Gross Grub Video 6: Giant Chinese Cockroach?

Uhm, This one took a serious effort…

GROSS GRUB Video 6 – Giant Cockroach

Sorry – just one – I couldn’t bring myself to eat anymore.

I reached down into the bowels of where my inner strength resides (or hides)…

I dove deep into the stuff that MAKES MEN…

and I pulled out this trick… I can’t believe I ate this thing. It was about 4 inches long and thick. Good thing it was fried or I’d have been heaving before I even tasted it.

The taste wasn’t anything special. It’s odd – yes, that’s for sure. Each bug had a different taste.

The – TEXTURE – now that was special. Imagine 6 legs of this beast in your mouth – getting caught between teeth and just not breaking down due to the chewing process being entirely inadequate.

Man was not MADE to eat these cockroaches. I know that now. There are other things we were not made to eat either – and one of them put me in the hospital – more on that later – just keep watching the series…

After I bit the head off this critter I looked into his thorax and saw some white gushy mess. Apparently they didn’t fry this baby as well as they should or COULD have either.

Oh well – it’s for traffic… it’s all for the love of Mother Google so anything goes…

Video:

Eating GIANT Cockroach >

Gross Grub Video 5: Hellgrammites!

I have no idea if these are hellgramites. In fact, I doubt that they are.

They LOOK like hellgrammites from what I remember about fishing in the northeastern USA. Every now and then one of my uncles that took me fishing would get a small styrofoam half-cup of these nasty things. They were not NEAR this big – and as I remember the fish didn’t like them either.

These things are nasty and they look like they have fangs. They look like wasps without wings and with fangs.

So, that’s my take on them. As I ate them all I could think about was fishing with them – putting them on the hook while hoping to avoid a bite or sting.

Video:

Eating Hellgrammites >

Gross Grub Video 4: Black Beetles!

Black beetles were on the menu next…

You are seeing this Gross Grub Series as a day to day series, but in fact they all happened on the same day in the span of about 2 hours. By this point I’d already eaten 4 things and only had some strawberry Fanta to wash it down. Which, if you engage in this type of consumption, I’d recommend as it washes away the buggy aftertaste pretty well.

Black beetles on left.

My apologies for the lack of detail in the photo – my attempt at a closeup got too close and it was a blurry mess. This is the better photo if you can believe that. Those are the black beetles on the left. On the right are crickets – and I think I inadvertently mixed the crickets with the grasshoppers back on day 2.

The beetles weren’t so bad really – one of the easier bugs to go down. Not as good as grasshoppers, but OK if you just have a minute to eat and grab a handful. You’ll probably be able to stomach them.

Eating Black Beetles >

Gross Grub Video 3: Silkworms!

Day 3 in the Gross Grub Series… this is quite sick…

Gross Grub Series 3:
Silkworms!

These were innocuous enough looking – and were actually my first choice when faced with the table of horrors.

Everything else except the mudfish or catfish type things had legs. Legs don’t go down so well as I found out right before munching this delicacy.

I was excited about eating these silkworms because – they just looked like little snacks. I thought maybe I’d get to like them.

These were NOT fried as well as the other bugs I had – maybe not even at all now that I think about it. Wait a second, no – you know what? They were too soft inside. These must have been raw.

Yikes. I didn’t really think about it when I ate them. But, it’s over now…

These had the uncanny texture of eating silk as the shell of their egg here must have been made from silk. They were a bit hard to chew. Like chewing a small patch of silk cloth. Really no different.

Compared to what I ate prior to this (day 6′s horrorshow) these silk worm grubs were nothing at all.

I even enjoyed them a bit… (I’m lying)

Video:

Raw Silk Worm Snacks >

Gross Grub Video 2: Grasshoppers!

Finding someone’s really nasty video from Cambodia about what they eat over there got me thinking… we eat some nasty stuff here in Thailand too.

That ignited a fire inside Mike.

Gross Grub Series was born…

Over the next few days I’ll show a Gross Grub video and photos featuring a different grotesque grub that people actually eat as snacks here in Thailand. Who knows, we might branch out to include other countries if we can find some good stuff.

On day 7 you’ll get a special treat – I devour a HUGE arachnid (spider family) for fame and fortune, but the joke ends up ON ME as I end up in the hospital overnight for allergy to the poison – some of which must have still been active. (That was a surprise…)

Today we have grasshoppers. My girlfriend has eaten them before and she said they are just a snack. Many people order a bagful as a treat on a long journey as they pass through a village that has buckets of fried grasshoppers for sale.

Really, the grasshoppers are no problem. They are like potato chips. Hardly any taste except the grease and salt. Hardly any…

Video:

Eating Grasshoppers Video >

Gross Grub Video 1 – Ant Larvae

Gross Grub 1:
Queen Ant Larvae

Living in
Thailand is
quite a lot
of fun…

today Ant Larvae for lunch,
tomorrow _______s

(You can wait and see what it is tomorrow – but, quite a bit MORE disgusting than just ant larvae!

QUITE a bit more horrifying than just eating ant larvae.

You decide…

So, I was an ant larvae virgin… I’ve stayed a virgin for most bug consumption here in Thailand – I don’t know HOW I’ve gotten away with only eating some rice bugs so far. I’ll push the boundaries of good taste in the coming pages though… In fact, today I’ll saddle up the girlfriend and we’ll head to the market.

The market is a bastion of atrocity… a market of horrors… I’ll eat whatever I think I can stomach – and probably some of what I CAN”T stomach.

No wretching.

So – enjoy this video – these ant larvae WERE NOT BAD. They had an acid like TWANG to them that is unexplainable in words. Tasty, but not like I want to add them to my diet on a regular basis.

This video is part of my Gross Grub Series on YouTube…Check it out!

Click >

Video:
Eating Ant Larvae for Lunch..

Zoos SUCK. Bears on Forced Weightloss Program

Bears are cute things – when looked at from a safe distance and with bars or some insurmountable obstacle between us and them.

Bears live in COLD climates – yes?

Are there any bears that naturally reside in Pattaya, Thailand?

HELL NO!

Why did people BRING them there? Bears need cool weather. They have a fur coat thicker than any other animal I can picture right now. Their hair is about 8 inches long – and thicker than toothpicks.

Why do human beings insist on being so inhumane to animals. First – they put the bears in a concrete prison with a concrete pool a few trees and one place to hide in the shade. Is that a fair substitute for what they had before?

Here are some bears sitting in 97 degrees fahrenheit and high humidity conditions. The bears are getting a bit unruly zoo officials commented.

HELL YA THEY ARE! You know what happens when prisons get too uncomfortable? People DIE in a riot that lasts 2 weeks.

I’m not saying kill the zoo-keepers – but for shit’s sake, let’s stop this stupidity that’s going on in all zoos.

ZOOS SUCK.